This is from my mom, upon reading my previous post on the subject; I found it fascinating:
There's a bit more to add to this picture...
it seems that most kids can adapt to having 2-3 caretakers for awhile, and that they actually develop self schemas that are expressed differently with different caretakers. For ex.:, the same child at age 2 might be fussy with an anxious mom, but passive at a daycare (where he's learned that no one comes if you fuss). so, the child has at least 2 complete schemas or responses or experiences of self, depending upon her environment. However, by ages 4-6,one of these schemas becomes predominent and the other fade, and the switching back and forth does not aid the process. But the alternate schema of self identification stays dormant and can be accessed in later life, like through therapy, or discipleship.
the other good news (for us parents that are sinners, too), is the concept by Donald Winnicott of "good-enough" parenting (vs. 'perfect' parenting). Winnicott hypothesized that parents just had to be good-enough, not perfect, in order to grow a mature child. (Winnicott was a Presbyterian!) And, recent research has borne (?bourne?) this out. During the first 4 years, if the child has consistant and attentive parenting at least 30% of the time, the child will develop the basic internal psychological structures it needs. So now we know that 'good-enough' means that 1/3 of the time I'm interacting with my child, I'm mature and loving and attentive. Obviously, the child develops better with more than 30%, but that's the magic number. So some kids in Daycare, if there's a small enough ratio of caregiver to child and if the caregivers are mature loving people, may do ok. Course, whether mommie can be 30% after a day at the office is another story.
In other news, in the alumni survey from my alma mater, I put my current career category down as "early childhood development" making "$0 - $10,999", or something like that. :)
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Wow... interacting with baby 1/3 of the time is the bare minimum for healthy development. As a mom of multiples who doesn't consider her family done, that's a bit daunting. Is this 1/3 of total hours or 1/3 of waking hours? And what counts as "consistent and attentive?" If the boys are playing in the kitchen and I'm jabbering at them a bit while I wash dishes is that "consistent and attentive?" Or are we talking individual interaction? If the latter, then this seriously limits the size of a healthy family. (By the time you have five kids, you're spending 5/3 of your time interacting with them.... The arithmetic does not look encouraging) Perhaps this is why, when I was in the hospital with these guys, I saw so many ads touting that sending your kid to preschool is crucial for his development?
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